Saturday, February 9, 2008

Mood: calm

Music: Screaming Infidelities - Dashboard Confessional

Second semester has started and already my life has just suddenly drained away. >.>

I have, in order: English (university), Hospitality (workplace), Math (College) and World History, which I think is also a university prep course. My English course changed from last year though; apparently it was really slack, and the grade twelve teachers were complaining that their students didn't know anything, so they've made it harder. It's not necessarily a bad thing, but it's supposed to be more like a first year university course now. Poetry is a big part though, which I guess is good, I like poetry. I've already chosen my poet and poem for my ISU. The Rose of Battle, W.B.Yeats. It's very pretty.

And so, life has been busy and conflicted. I've had homework every night since Monday, which is more traumatizing then it sounds, because last semester I had one class that I actually did any work in, and had a spare to do the rare homework we got. So I barely had any. Although, the homework does give me a good reason to go to the library at lunch, despite my friends horror. But I love the library, it's warm, comfortable and quiet.

For the conflict, I guess that's mostly my fault. I have a tendency to get sick of people, I guess, and just push them away after a while. Maybe, I'm not sure. But regardless, since this time last year, I've been spending most of my time (at school, anyways) with one friend, and it just kind of gets to be enough? Especially since I've been feeling restless, and her opinions are clashing with mine. Actually, everything she does kind of clashes with what I do, and it's tiring. And I've realized that I'm falling back into my usual routine and giving myself to one person, and failing to spend time with anyone else. So I've been trying to spend more time with other friends, and maybe even hang out with them (the horror). We've only got a year and a half left, and it just doesn't seem like a lot of time anymore. As much as I want to get on with it and start my life, I want to be with friends.

So yeah. Drama. And, I need to go find a new job. But that's nothing new, I say that almost every single day. Maybe I should get around to it?

I've been on a Dashboard Confessional kick. I don't know why I didn't like them the first time I listened to some of their stuff, but I absolutely love them now. My friend's brother was playing some of their cd's, and I kind of just fell in love with them, and am now downloading all the torrents of their albums. I'm so behind in our music >.>

Anyways, hopefully today I can play some video games (more! I got to on our snow day) and buy healthy food.

I'd like healthy food. I need to be more healthy, or I'm going to die of malnutrition >.>

what we could have been, 11:37 AM 1 comments .