Tuesday, September 9, 2008
Music: CRAWL - VeltpunchMood: sleepy, dissatisfied
My biggest concern of the half hour is that I need to change my layout. A new season means a new layout, in my eyes XD
My biggest concern of all time, however, if the feeling of loneliness and the thought that I'm missing out on what's supposed to be a fun-filled year with friends; celebrating the fact that this is our last year of high school before being turned out into the world. Except I'm left feeling uncontent; with my friends, job and life. SOme people spend all of their free time with their friends, while I spend my free time reading and trying not to die.
It's amazing how nothing changes, really. My friendships have change, yet the situation never changes. Somehow it's good, and somehow it's bad. OR maybe it's the cooling air and the loss of the warm summer air that's making me feel this way; fall is one of those romantic, happy seasons, in my eyes. To me, fall feels like you should be partying it up and have fun and enjoying what you can before you're locked inside with work.
But really, I guess it's all a result form my need to make more friends. I really want to meet new people,e make more friends and have a chance at a relationship. Somehow though, I feel like it won't happen this year XD I think I should get a new job though, on the other side of town; then I can work with people from other schools.
Otherwise, my life is good. My father caved, and my brother officially lives with us; though we are broke from the lawyers. Jurita is back, so I have entertainment at school. Britty and I are as close as ever, and my schedule rocks. Three periods, then I can go home. It's amazing. Next semester I have a spare first period, which I am not trading for ANYTHING, because god, I would love to be able to sleep until eight every morning!
Of course, there are downsides; I have no locker, Jill was sending homicidal glares at me today (scary, for sure. Really...), and I have gained weight. With all the stress and cravings that have been going on, I haven't had the chance to lose weight yet. But now I think I'm back on track. Hopefully. I'm going to go for a good long walk tonight though...
The other bad thing is that I haven't talked with Brenna in FOREVER. (I WILL BE ON TONIGHT FOR SURES UNTIL ABOUT 8:30, AND ON FOR SURE ALL TOMORROW AFTERNOON/ NIGHT!!!!!!! FOR SURE!!!!!!!!)
I have so much I want to say to her.
And sadly, homework is calling, so that's what I'm going to do. It's weird;I haven't done real homework and god knows how long.
. . .I'm sort of excited XD
......it's sad, I know >.>
what we could have been, 5:39 PM
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